Tom the Best Man

The backstory: When Tom died, Nicole (my sister) and Austin (her boyfriend) decided to get married. Specifically, they decided on the night of Tom's celebration. Nic and Austin were so inspired by the love Tom and I shared that they chose to commit after over 14 years together. However, they were not comfortable asking me to be a part of the wedding since Tom had just passed. They were also not sure a big wedding was appropriate since they had both been married before and even within their relationship Nicole had been a runaway bride at least once. So they waited.

During the first few months Nicole asked me if I had any regrets. I had so many. I should have never left the hospital, we should have gone to the Mayo clinic,we should have never had meat in our house, and 100 more that would not have changed a thing. But one stood out. I wished I had taken Tom's name. For both of us I wish I would have been Mrs. Tom Lawrence.

In June, Nic and Austin decided to elope and spent the next two months planning a secret and wonderful wedding to be held in August, on their 15th anniversary, in Sedona. There would only be four invited guests, two of which were Betsy and Keene, N&A's very close friends. They were invited two weeks before the event.

I was another guest and I was never actually invited. I was tricked into coming with a variety of stories including birthday celebration, FBI awards, and time out of Houston. They wanted the wedding to be a surprise!

Tom was the fourth guest – Austin’s best man.

When I arrived in Phoenix (to surprise Nicole when she got the top secret award), we drove from the airport up to Sedona for a picnic and to pick up some art work. The fact that I had just traveled most of the day and we were about to drive five hours round trip for a lunch in 100 degree weather seemed perfectly normal to them. Of course there was no picnic, no art work and no top secret FBI award.

It was only after we arrived in the parking lot of the B&B did I learn that tomorrow Nic and Austin were getting married at sunset in a beautiful park right outside the town. Tom and I were invited.

The best of all was that Tom was going to attend as Best Man. Nicole and Austin had brought up the last little pebbles they had of Big Tom and I had a photograph of him that Betsy would carry during the ceremony. Nicole had selected a poem for me to read during the event. Coincidentally enough I had a copy of the book with the poem in it – and had brought it with me to read on the plane.
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The wedding was perfect. At one point Austin and I kneeled next to a stream and I placed Tom’s pebbles in the water while Austin placed some of his mom, Geneva’s ashes. We cried and laughed and in the many hours of food and drink that followed toasted the Mr. and Mrs. Austin Barrett, Geneva, and Tom many times.

I can’t imagine there has ever been a dead Best Man before, but I know Tom did the job admirably. While he did not hold the ring, he was there in spirit, clearing the rain, and giving us a glorious view. Thank you Big Tom. Thank you for your love and for allowing us to love you. Thanks for being Austin’s Best Man. And mine.