Be back in your lover's arms immediately

I have to be honest. On many occasions I have missed Tom to the point of wanting to make poor choices about the continuation of my heart beat. Unfortunately, the repressed Catholicism in me has strenuously objected assuring me that if I decide when to see Tom again I certainly will not see him again ever.

As this delves into a level of spirituality, myth, and psychoanalysis I am not equipped to deal with at this time I have taken no action. However, the universe has interceded!

On a recent visit to Home Depot this was left on my car.




For only $10 all my problems will be solved. I will be reunited with my lover permanently. I'll let you know how it works out.